House Escher: Spares, Repairs and Very Big Hair

Who remembers Necromunda? Not the recent one, which I've never played, but the mid-90s skirmish game. It came in a box with cardboard terrain and awful plastic models, and involved odd-looking gangs fighting it out in the depths of a hive city. It was complex, interesting and probably an inspiration for Mordheim, which had a similar basis but removed some of the more awkward rules.

Several years ago, my friend James and I played quite a few games of Necromunda, and we enjoyed it a lot. It's got some weird features: like Mordheim, it's designed to be played in a tournament-style campaign, and a winning gang quickly outstrips the gang it defeats. Also like Mordheim, most games end with one gang running away, and the rules as to which of your minions survive are pretty crude and arbitrary. Unlike Mordheim, Necromunda puts a lot of emphasis on pinning your enemies with gunfire, and making them lose their turns. It's an interesting mechanic, but a potentially irritating one too.

Necromunda certainly had its problems as a game, not least the needlessly complex and so-random-it's-unfair dishing out of territory at the start. You could just award each player $200 every time they fought a battle and have just as much fun. One of the things I do like, though, is the comparative lack of detail in the backstory. Most of the details are, unsurprisingly, cloaked in shadow. I really like this, as it gives the player the opportunity to make up pretty much whatever they like.

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Gangers of House Escher, by Mark Gibbons.

One of the six big gangs (like Dune, Necromunda calls them "houses") is House Escher. Escher is an unusual organisation, as almost all of its members are women. They're basically amazons in space, and their skills suggest that they are fast and good at close combat. Escher fighters have an odd visual style, as if someone decided to make them "sexy" and changed their mind at the last minute. As it is, they look like a punk band about to do some kind of yoga class. I suspect that their design owes a lot to Tank Girl, who was big in the 90s.

That said, the old metal miniatures look much better than the modern plastics, which all have weird metal clogs as if they've just removed a pair of skis. One of my pet hates in miniatures is female soldiers in high heels - I can almost understand some maniac running into battle in their underwear or even barefoot, but heels just look silly even by the silly standards of Warhammer.

Anyhow, I've been avoiding these models for a while, or more accurately summoning up the courage to attempt to paint them. The amount of detail on the Escher miniatures - designed and, I think, sculpted by the excellent Jes Goodwin - is incredible. They're very slight, and there's a lot of opportunity to paint detail and get it wrong. Unlike orks, they've got human faces and, unlike eldar, they don't have the decency to wear helmets. That's just not on. 

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All of this week's models are repairs of some kind, because it was cheaper to get the models broken off ebay and to tidy them up myself. Also, it adds variety, as I've got some duplicates.

The ganger on the left was missing her left arm, so I replaced it with a dark eldar arm. The woman on the right didn't have her right foot. I made a bionic one out of a skeleton foot and a cut-down necron arm, using the elbow joint as a metal kneecap for her. I think it's worked pretty well. 

The next pair are juves: young members of the gang who are weedier and less reliable than the seasoned fighters. One thing I really like about the old metal juves is that they tend to look worried and frantic. Necromunda has a much better range of expressions than 40k (space marines have one face per chapter). Neither had a head, so I replaced them with Stargrave heads, which were small enough to look right on their scrawny bodies and had some suitably extreme haircuts.

Finally, we've got two models built from the same body. Bear with me here. Each Necromunda gang had access to heavy weapon soldiers, imaginatively named "heavies". Most gangs had two or three heavy models, one of which would be armed with a stubber (a clunky, WW2 type machine gun). The Escher stubber body seems to be easy to get hold of, while the other heavy model, who has a plasma gun, goes for silly money.

I found what seemed to be the plasma gun variant, but wasn't. I ended up with two spare copies of the stubber body, and so I converted them both to be doing new things. This model was given pistols and a mechanical arm from Stargrave:

And this one got a new arm, a gun cobbled together from various bits and bobs, a backpack from some kind of Mantic robot, and some sculpted armour to cover the gaps:

After all that, here they are painted!

While there's no uniform here, I've tried to use a set of reoccurring colours. The outfit designs are vaguely inspired by old GW paint schemes and Tank Girl comic books. I've tried to introduce variety by varying the skin tones a bit, although it might not be obvious.

So, join me next time for more brightly-coloured Necromunda loonies. Or possibly not. I've got a lot of fantasy miniatures stripped and ready to go, and I've just bought some goblin green paint...

Oldhammer Goff Ork Unit, and a few thoughts on batch painting

I've no idea why this should be the case, but the numbers of views that this blog usually gets have leaped up with the last two posts. The last post, with the ork robot, got about seven times the number of views that the average post gets on this blog. I have no idea what has caused this, but I suspect that they represent bots drawn to this blog like vultures to a man lost in the desert. I expect that the next couple of posts will be hugely disappointing and normal non-service will be resumed.

Anyhow, I've been painting some plastic Goff orks from the 1990s. Back in the day, they were available on their own in a unit-filler set of ten, and also in a boxed game along with gretchin and (of course) space marines. They're not technically monopose, as the right arm is separate and could be stuck on at a range of exciting angles, but really, there's not a lot of variety.

I painted them in groups of three, and for some insane reason tried to vary the outfits so that none of them were identically dressed. I don't know why I did this. The models are pretty decent, and have a nice balance of simplicity and detail, but I don't really enjoy batch painting and I was a bit tired of it by the end. I did save one bloke and painted him up with more detail and fancy golden horns to represent a champion for the unit.

Here is the champion.

I think they're quite cool, but they do make me wonder about painting squads. Since I very rarely play any games, is there any point to batch painting? I have a lot of nostalgia for old Fantasy Battle armies, with their matching uniforms, and it would be nice to own one. However, I'm used to the idea of small units where each model is a character - as you'd seen in Mordheim, Necromunda and the Frostgrave games. 

Besides, painting several miniature at once removes some of the pleasure of individual painting. When I'm doing one model at a time, at some level I'm wondering what this particular guy wears, what his function is, and so on. Obviously you lose a lot of that sense of painting individual characters when you're doing a whole load at once.

That said, I've got a small Bretonnian army to paint. Hmm. Anyhow, the next post is going to be something small and individual. Maybe from Necromunda...

Ork Dreadnought Time!

 So, Toby, how's that project to repaint all your old Brettonians going? Well, it's not really started yet. In fact, I'm still not entirely sure how to spell Bretonnia. On the other hand, I did rebuild and repaint an ork dreadnought that I scratch-built many years ago. The best laid plans of squig and man, as they say...

The main body of this thing is some kind of broken toy that I was given by a friend. The legs are landing gear from a marine flyer. The guns come from a very cheap walker from (I think) a Russian wargame (again, I bought these a decade ago, so my memory isn't great). The rest is stuff from the bits box.

I tried to give the dreadnought a wonky, awkward look like a clockwork toy. The clockwork key at the back was a late addition, made from plasticard and a bit of rod. I did wonder if it was a bit too silly, but you probably can't overdo it with old fashioned orks.

Just in case anyone's wondering (which I doubt), the yellow was painted over several thin coats of pink. The metal is done with a base coat of dark brown, onto which dark grey is roughly drybrushed. Then increasing amounts of plate metal and silver are added to the dark grey, all the way up to pure silver for chips and scratches. I find that the dark brown gives the metal a tarnished look that suits orks and heavy machinery.

I don't intend to make a big force of these old orks. For one thing, the metals are expensive and the early plastic orks aren't that great (and are expensive). But a small skirmishing group would be fun - and very Rogue Trader, where twenty men, one dreadnought and a converted shampoo bottle constituted an entire army.

Even More Space Orks - Weirdboy and Painboy

 So, after all that stuff about repainting my ancient Brettonia models, I've thrown myself into Oldhammer with a vengeance and painted some... space orks. These days, grimdark is very big again (did it ever go away?) and I don't seem to be able to open Instagram without seeing a sepia demon made of severed legs and barbed wire vomiting mud onto the baby Jesus. Ever one to jump onto a bandwagon (or battlewagon), here are some more bright green orks from the good old days.

First up, here's a weirdboy, an ork psychic. This guy is from the Blood Axe clan, but let's ignore that. The important thing is that he's an absolutely awesome sculpt. He seems to be dressed like a mixture of a Napoleonic soldier, a voodoo priest and a majorette, which fits the semi-military look of the Blood Axes perfectly. He also just looks absolutely brilliant.

This model was unusually large for an old ork sculpt. I'm pretty sure he's an original, as the base tag even said "wierdboy" (sic). I mounted him on a bigger base. He was missing the top of his staff, so I made a new one with an Empire bit. The laurelled skull matches his hat. His left arm was made from an newer plastic ork bit with an ogre hand and a lot of green stuff: partly to keep in scale with his body, but also because he needed a sleeved arm to match the metal one. 

Then we've got a super painboy (medic) miniature. In the old background, orks didn't have hair, so they sometimes put hairy squigs on their heads. That's what this chap has got. He's also got a brilliant expression. Many of the old orks have real charm and personality - not that I'd like to meet this guy and his massive pliers.

Here are three plastic boys that I painted over a little while. They're not the best miniatures, but they've come up alright. Getting the plasma gun to sit on the model's shoulder - and getting his hand to hold it - was really difficult, and I ended up using a lot of green stuff and additional parts to make it look reasonable.

And that's it for now, but more plastic orks will be appearing soon. Watch this space!

Brettonia Redux: My First Painted Models Ever

The first models I ever bought and painted were a bunch of ancient Eldar (now sadly gone) and a load of metal Brettonians. I got the Brettonians from a kid called Alan for very little money, mainly because I wanted to play Fantasy Battle and they looked like King Arthur guys, which I recognised. I painted the Brettonians over a week and proudly fielded them in their first battle. They were the only painted miniatures in the game and I was so keen that I gave every one of my knights his own name.

They were garbage. My opponent exterminated them, and so I failed to take the hint and bought some more. What I didn't know then was that, at the time that I was starting to play Warhammer, the only armies that GW cared about were High Elves, Empire, Orcs, High Elves, a bit of Chaos and High Elves. My main opponent had High Elves.

For a long time, Brettonia was literally the Empire without any of the good units. Fighting High Elves was like a medieval army fighting the Battle of the Somme: they just got mowed down by bolt throwers. The only way to win was to buy the minimum number of actual Brettonians and to pack out the army with manticores (I do miss those general lists of monsters available to all armies, which gave them a lot more options).

But now, Brettonia has two army books and even a new list in the Old World. Hmm...

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Repainting the Alice in Warhammerland models got me thinking about my old Brettonians, and Lasgunpacker's comment on my last post pushed me over the edge. I've considered repainting my Warhammer Frenchmen before, but have been deterred by the complexity of the heraldry involved. However, painting old harlequin models has given me a bit more confidence - at least, in painting checks. 

Here are some of my old models. I'm putting these pictures up as a bit of a record, as I'm going to strip and repaint them. They've got no real shading and are extremely basic, but they're not bad for my first efforts.

(Incidentally, the first GW Brettonian army was painted in flat block colours, without shading. It looked very basic.)

So there they are. I also found a few blister packs in a box at my parents', stashed away for many years and testament to a time when even GW were desperate to get rid of the Brettonians. Back then, as my friend with the High Elves pointed out, £1 was not a bargain.

So there we are. I am going to paint a load of Brettonians in the near future. Not a very big load, certainly not a proper army, and I will paint them pretty slowly. But I reckon they might look nice, and it'll be an interesting project.

Now I'm going to paint some space orks.

Alice in Warhammerland

 I've always liked the Alice books. They're extremely strange, and have a weird combination of logic and anarchy that's very appealing. Also, they're fantasy stories that aren't derived from Tolkien, which is actually quite rare. They're both sinister and comical at once, which of course makes them ideal for adaptation to Warhammer 40,000.

Well, to be honest, it doesn't. Modern 40k consists largely of identical bald men shouting "Heresy!" at once another, which isn't ideal for a surreal Victorian children's story about a little girl with yellow hair. But what the heck.

I did these conversions a long time ago, but I took the opportunity to repaint them where needed. In the case of Alice, I entirely stripped and dismantled the original model. This involved resculpting quite a lot of green stuff and making her a new base. It was a right pain, to be honest, but the end result is definitely an improvement on the original. How much of an improvement, I'm not totally sure. 

So, Alice is basically the upper body of a sister of battle and the bottom half of an Eldar warlock, with lots of extra bits stuck on. I've no idea where her pointy little feet came from. I think her hammer is from a Mordheim sprue.

The Hatter is based on a Mordheim plastic soldier, with a lot of green stuff. His gun is probably from a plastic terminator. 

The Cheshire Cat is from Neferata, an old vampire model. He's got some sculpting around the mouth, and is standing on a bit of wood elf dryad to make a tree.

Getting a half-decent picture of these models was very difficult, which is really irritating but feels appropriate somehow. Here they are - normal people going about their lives.

Loads of Tyranids - zoats, zoanthropes and spore mines

 Hello again! It's time for a big post about tyranids.

I've been slowly working on a bunch of old tyranid models over the last couple of months. First up, I was able to acquire a second metal zoat fairly cheaply on ebay a while ago. This chap has a missile launcher. While he's a very detailed model, I found it quite hard to work out exactly what was what with his weapon. I suppose it's all "biological stuff", so that's not too much of an issue. I enjoyed painting this model a lot.

Here he is with his friend, about to hit the town.

Next up are three zoanthropes. These are floating psychic creatures that functioned in the game as tank-shooting artillery, a bit like lascannon teams. These models are the second iteration of the zoanthrope and were released around 2000: the first version was a four-limbed creature like a Tyranid warrior with a very big head, and looked a bit silly (like a lot of the very early Tyranids).

Originally, these guys had large helmet-like shields that went over their heads, and were usually painted like bone armour. However, these shields obscure their heads, and I think they they look better with their nasty little faces on display. They're identical models, although someone had trimmed the spikes off one of the miniatures. If you want to bulk out your army with a conga line of giant evil sperms, this is the unit for you.

Last of all, I've painted a unit of spore mines. Spore mines were Tyranid artillery, either fired by a creature called a biovore, or dropped in from on high and left to drift around the battlefield. They were essentially a mobile hazard, and were probably intended to slow down and confuse the enemy. They come in three varieties (frag, acid and krak), and were both plastic and metal. I bought some of these models as a bunch, and others came with various old tyranids. I collected them together until I had enough for a little unit.

Strange looking things, really (they remind me of Smarties), but they do fit the rather jolly colours of the rest of the army, and they're actually quite nice miniatures. They would make good weird little aliens, too. 

I'm not sure what I'll be painting next, but I think it will be some kind of fantasy creature. We shall see!

Retro Chaos Dreadnought

 Hello! I've had a busy week. I went to Glastonbury to relax for a couple of days, which was great, and then I injured my knee, which was less great. The damage isn't awful, but it does make sitting down to paint uncomfortable, and so I've been chipping away at little bits and bobs.

That said, I have been able to finish a model that I've been working on for a while. Hybrid Miniatures make a range of retro-styled miniatures, some of them quite reminiscent of 40k models from the good old days. They were having a sale of some of their old-school resin dreadnoughts, and I took the opportunity to get one of these.

The old dreadnought was the first dreadnought specifically made for Chaos, and can be seen in the blue Citadel catalogue. It had a very organic, Giger-ish look, with pipes and pincers, and an odd big skull for a head. It looked really cool to my mind and is my favourite version of the Chaos dread. Later versions were either blocky and awkward-looking (the 3rd ed version) or very fleshy (the Hellbrute). 

Anyhow, I went for a similar colour scheme to that which I used on a Necromunda Spyrer a while back. I highlighted the black with both grey and khaki. The weapons and pipes were painted quite brightly, for contrast and as a nod to the old version. I also painted a few pipes to look organic. Anyhow, here we are! It's 90% finished, but there are a couple of bits that I'd like to add to.

More Medieval Marines

 Here are some marines. I had so much trouble getting a half-decent photograph of any of these.

This is a "masters of the chapter" model which was missing a head and an arm.

This guy is an unconverted veteran marine.

The two below are lower-ranking marines with basic bolters, based on some pretty battered plastic marines that I got from ebay. This bloke has a Bretonnian man-at-arms head and helmet. 

And the final marine has an Empire shield on his left pauldron. I used chequered patterns for variety and to suggest additional heraldry.

They'll be joining the rest of my knightly marines (named the Shining Knights until I think of something better). I don't know why, but the pictures look as if there's almost no shading on these models. I should get back to painting something more photogenic.

Mordheim - Mercenaries and Monsters

 It's been a long time since I've done any fantasy models. In fact, the last fantasy model that I posted on this blog was in January. I certainly default to science fiction in modelling: the colours are more interesting (there's less brown to paint!) and there's more options for weird creatures and people. 

Anyway, this month I went back to Mordheim, and to finish off some models that I started a while ago and just abandoned.

First up, we've got two archers, painted in the black-and-yellow livery that I seem to have chosen for this warband. They use old Mordheim mercenary bodies and legs, with arms from the North Star Frostgrave Ghost Archipelago Crewmen sprue (catchy title). The first Frostgrave plastic soldiers were a little crude, to my mind, but these later models are really decent. The chap on the right has a Crewman head, too. 

Then we've got two oddballs. The little hobbit chap was an unconverted plastic miniature that came in a job lot of random models. He had a slotta tab, but it was blank. It seems that he was from either Talisman or Warhammer Quest (or possibly both). He actually looks like the man from the covers of Mad Magazine, so I painted him to resemble that guy. I'm generally not much of a hobbit fan, and it seems out of place that one of these tubby, barefoot yokel-children should be in the city of the damned, but what the heck.

The other fighter is a more complex conversion, designed to look like a tattered, weary veteran. He has a Mordheim left arm, the right arm of a Bretonnian knight, a Chaos marauder shield, a body and head from the Empire Pistoliers set (very good for bits), and legs from a 40k Chaos cultist. The bag attached to his belt is from Bolt Action. The weird fishy crest on his helmet came from an Empire cannon kit.

I really like the end result, although making him took ages. I like the idea of these guys wearing uniforms that were once flashy and ornate, and now are grubby and battered.

And that's not all! Here's a conversion that I did ages ago and never painted. It's a Chaos minion (unsurprisingly), based on an old metal sorcerer body. I gave him a genestealer head and a metal tentacle for a tail, as well as a right arm from a Necromunda Goliath bit. As I painted him, I was surprised by how detailed the basic metal body was. He's pretty manky.

I also found some counters for traps, that came in a Mantic terrain set many years ago. They were nice models, and easy to paint. 

Last and most definitely least, all the models in this post are standing on a base plate painted to resemble paving stones. This was a piece of MDF with lines scored into it. I've no idea who sold it. I painted it grey, with a few stones painted in brighter shades for variety. I painted the upper edge of each stone slightly lighter, to give the impression of light coming from one source and catching on the edge of the stones. I think this is called trompe d'oeil. A little bits of brown dirt and green moss was added on with thinned paint. It's not perfect, but it will work as an interesting base for photography.

I've got a few Mordheim warbands painted, but I did them a few years ago, and they'd be much better if I painted them now. I might try to tidy up my older painting and make a few improvements. We shall see!

For A Few Eldar More

 Here are a few more of the excellent old Eldar guardian models. On the right is a really old guardian from the Rogue Trader days. He was missing his head, so I gave him one from a dark eldar that's quite similar to the original.

Beside him is an Eldar knight from the old Epic game. The knights are rather weird, gawky models, but this particular one is about the right size and shape to help out. If it became necessary, I'd count it as an additional guardian.

And here is the whole bunch. I do like their blue armour!

Next time, we're back in Mordheim...

When Eldar Guardians Were Good

 For many years - pretty much from the 3rd edition of Warhammer 40,000 to the 9th - eldar guardians were the unit you didn't take. They were basically a citizen levy of comparatively-basic eldar troops, who could be called up to defend their homes. They had poor stats, weak armour and short-ranged weapons (for some insane reason, the shuriken catapults they carried could shoot a pathetic 12 inches). Their only use was to form a human shield around a heavy weapon - which, given that eldar are meant to be rare and their lives valuable, doesn't make a lot of sense.

However, guardians have some nice miniatures. The old metal models are pretty decent, and have been since the days of Rogue Trader, when they had individual names like Smellibreth Strongwind (I made that one up). Some of my favourite guardians came slightly later, and wore bulkier armour and large helmets. They tend to be referred to as "proto-dire avengers" and were sculpted by the great Jes Goodwin.

I really like these guys: they get the balance between sleekness and bulk just right, and look like tough customers who might have a bit more experience than regular guardians. They're well-equipped, and their armour reminds me of the armour that the Sisters of Battle now have (without the corsets). I had some of these guys lying around and painted them up.

There aren't many proto-dire avenger sculpts. I happened to have one model who was missing an arm and a head, and so I gave him a dark eldar head and an arm (and staff) from a high elf mage. This was quite fiddly, but I like the way it came out. He looks as if he's signalling with it.

I painted these guys in the standard colours that I've used for Craftworld Zandros, using spot colours to tie them into the other "regular army" units. 

And here are three more, sporting amazing hats and hairstyles. I wonder how the guy with the mohican gets his helmet on?

Here they are as a unit. That's almost all the models ever released in this style, but I really like them, and they look cool together.

Zoat!

There are many strange things in Rogue Trader, the ancient tome from which Warhammer 40,000 comes. Some have been elaborated in ever-more-excessive detail (space marines), others haven't changed much (imperial guard) and some have more or less disappeared. 

So, very briefly: zoats were great big tortoise/rhino/ogre centaur things that worked for the tyranids as elite troops and, weirdly, ambassadors. The tyranids produced hormones that made the zoats loyal, but every so often some zoats would break loose and usually ended up working as mercenaries. Famously, according to Rogue Trader, the zoats lived on "Zoatibix". 

There were four 40k zoat models: they all used the same lower body, which makes me wonder if they weren't very popular.

The zoats appeared in the first tyranid army list, which was published in White Dwarf. However, by the time the first codex appeared, they had disappeared. They got a sort of mention in a later codex, as "Colossi" who fought in the "Zoastra-Attila War" against mankind. A zoat appears in Blackstone Fortress, so they're clearly out there somewhere.

Anyhow, I like zoats. Perhaps it's that they're a bit like dinosaurs, or just that they're rather odd. I was very lucky and won an ebay auction for two zoats for a pretty reasonable price on ebay (they normally go for silly money). I painted the first one in a scheme reflecting the model shown in Rogue Trader.

There's loads of good detail on this model: just the two pistols are great sculpting. I was surprised and impressed by how crisp and neat this thing is. It's listed as being sculpted by the Citadel Design Team in the old blue catalogue, but I'd be interested to know who was involved. 

I also took the chance to paint up a few old plastic termagants. These models don't actually overlap with the zoats, but they've got a certain goofy charm.